Dear IPTA members and all of you in the Clemson nation. I’m here today to try to help take your pain away.      You are in the middle of a weekly torture session. Your football team is letting you down AGAIN and you need a change. When you see the colors Orange and purple you start to feel ill, the name Bowden brings a sense of anger in you that before was only reserved for gamecock fans. You have all the gear you bought, your car is covered in stickers; you can hear people laughing at you when you’re in the grocery store.       Here’s an offer to you on how to become a happy sports fan in the fall and winter. Start getting into Detroit Redwings Hockey!  The wings have been playing hockey longer than I think you’ve been playing football. They are one of the most consistent sports teams in the past 20 years; they just hoisted the 11^th Stanley cup Championship banner into the rafter at Joe Louis arena last night and have almost the whole team back from last year. They are poised to make another run for the cup this year too! And  Think about it, You can still tailgate but just do it in your drive way and you can do it like 3- 4 times a week cause they play several games each week. Look I know hockey is Foreign to a lot of you but I also have a way to help you learn the game, talk the talk and feel a part of a winning or-gan-IZ-A sion(That’s how Canadians say organization). Adopt a Wings fan for the season. You just have to give them a little beer Deer meat and cheese products and they will guide you through your journey to hockey heaven. Think of the fun and all the joy you’ll experience as your Redwings grind through a long winter winning night after night and then the long nights watching the wings in a playoff game on the west coast that lasts till like 3am if you’re lucky. Sure you can’t skate and you say “Ya’ll” and we say “you guys” eh! Heck we could make this the southern command for the Red Wings nation, and eventually we could put death Valley to good use by turning the field frozen for rec league hockey  and get more giant screens in the stadium, and instead of the millions spent on the football team they would only have to get hooked up to the N.H.L. network and the N.H.L. package so we could all watch games together a “the Joe of the South”.      I’m just trying to help yaaaa’aaaallll  get through the rest of the season and well sure stir up a little more interest for the greatest hockey team in all da world der eh!      Or maybe I’m just starting a new plot for the north to invade the south? Well either way it’s better than watching what watched on the T.V. last night, EH!